Losing yourself happens when you react from your wounds.
When your wound is rejection, you are in fear of being rejected and that’s why you withdraw.
When your wound is abandonment, you’re scared of being abandoned and that’s why you behave clingy to keep people in your life.
When your wound is humiliation, you’re scared of being humiliated and in order to avoid facing that fear you want to please other people as much as you can.
When your wound is betrayal, you’re scared of being betrayed and that’s why you need to control other people or external situations.
When your wound is injustice, you’re scared of and triggered by injustice. In order to avoid facing that fear you wear a mask of a rigid person.
To avoid your triggers and fears you react from ego’s defense mechanisms because that’s how you protect yourself.
The problem is that the same pattern you have will repeat as long as you don’t fully see how you are the source of it. Once you face it and heal it the pattern stops.
You can’t lose yourself anymore because you can’t lose yourself in your fears or past behaviors. You become empowered, secure, the source of what you desire to expirience instead of being the source of what you don’t prefer.
Hi, what if the relationship pattern is similar and that came from not having own house, proper job or well settled in life. I used to think this way, if I get better salary have own appartment, car and settled life, I can fall in love and marry the person I desire however stuck in a job with less salary and avoiding relationships, I used to unconsciously push people away thinking that these own house or material things are need to get honest relationship. How can I fix this limiting beliefs and remove it from core, I have been in few relationships, and due to negative emotions and overthinking these were short term, I always wanted long term honest relationship and marriage with SP!
Please can you help